I took a sick day today. I think it was the third one I have taken in about four years. I went to bed last night feeling miserable all over and woke up this morning feeling like I had just finished my first day of basic training and been left out in the cold all night with every inch of my body hurting... even the hair on my arms. I slept for about 18 hours with a few potty breaks. After being up for four hours, I am ready to go back to bed. I am obviously sick. Yet... I feel so guilty about calling off sick from work. REALLY??? What is that about?
Is this a mom thing? I know there is rarely a time that is convenient for moms to be sick but honestly... my mom hours are very limited these days... I don't have a child at home to take care of. In fact, Kate is in Oklahoma visiting for a week so I am essentially excused from all mom duties except an occasional worry that she is eating right and exhibiting good manners.
Is it because I am a woman? I know most women, moms or not, overwork and have full agendas 24/7. But... with no college classes right now, and a full time job that really only requires 35 hours a week, I am not locked into a strict schedule.
Is it because my job is so important? Well... this is kind of a secret but... no one will die if I don't go to work. They might think they will if their printers don't work, but the truth is... they will live through the day. The other girls on the team have the building covered and under controlled.
Is it a generational trait? I don't think so because other people in my generation do not hesitate to take sick days. But I will confess ignorance here... just where does one generation end and the next one begin? I'm not exactly sure what generation I am part of.
This guilt, like so many other pressures is simply self-imposed. I have to get A's in all my classes. I have to walk the dog three times each day. I have to wash the sheets every weekend. I have to be up at 0500 every morning. I have to clean the litter box on Sunday and Wednesday. And if I don't, I feel guilty.
The timing of this bout of illness and resultant guilt just might mean I need to make a resolution for 2012.....
Wendy - be more flexible and don't sweat the small stuff. Anyone want to define "small" for me?